There should be a law against laziness… (Wo)man up, Award Time!

November 4, 2009

in random

On 17 October 2009, the lovely Jane over at They Call Me Jane temporarily lost her mind and shared with me another award that she just won.  It is displayed below as Exhibit 1 Exhibit 2:

Kreativ Blogger Award

If I don’t end up in the nut house, it is partly because the love and support from a stranger, who no longer feels like a stranger any more, and her name is Jane.  I am not saying this because Jane has given me two awards.  Two awards!  That’s got to count as something, right?! She is one of the most level-headed, fair, rational, understanding, sensitive, thoughtful, and wisest people I have come to know through this thing invented by Al Gore. Her blog is like a fresh breath of air: a thinking blog that does not put your to sleep.  And the most important thing is?  She is REAL.  She is NOT pretentious.  She is naturally cool without having to say one single cuss word.

At this point, after reading her blog on a nearly daily basis, Jane can say nothing wrong in my book.  If she says, one day, and this is purely hypothetical, people, that she is actually a bunny killer, Imma gonna guess it is the bunnies’ fault.  Just sayin.

It took me more than 2 weeks to officially “accept” this award because I have to come up with 7 random things about me.  I guess nothing X-rated is allowed…  And you all know, at least those who have read my blog on a semi-regular basis (i.e. more than 3 times in the past 6 months), that I am Asian, more specifically, Chinese.  There goes my Number 1 through Number 3: Hi, surprise! I am Asian/Chinese. I can speak/read/write Chinese. I like rice. (I DO! DAMN IT!).

Ok.  Here it goes, in no particular order:

  1. I am secretly obsessed with angels.  As in, I believe in them.  Or, I strongly wish they are/were real, even though I am not Christian. I envision them to be the angels in Wim Wender’s “Wings of Desire” (Der Himmel über Berlin). NOT the Nicolas Cage one. Oh, god, no.
  2. I am agnostic because I am too cowardly to make up my mind.  I want to have my cake and eat it too.
  3. I am a classic insecure overachiever.  Psychotic.  A bit bi-polar.  I guess I should have added these to my “About” page. Oh well.
  4. Laziness and fear of embarrassment are the driving forces of my life.
  5. I played Lizzie Borden in a play when I was in graduate school.  In fact, I played a few other homicidal characters, including Hamlet and one of the women in “Unfinished Women Cry in No Man’s Land While a Bird Dies in a Gilded Cage” who gets to wield an ICE PICK!  (I was totally typecast, I suspected…)
  6. Being on stage was the only times when I felt completely free.  I miss that feeling with a heartache, barely noticeable except during the night, when I am writing to nobody.  Like now.
  7. I also played Billy the Kid (adapted from Michael Ondaatje’s book) and I had the best lines in my acting career:

After shooting Gregory
this is what happened

I’d shot him well and careful
made it explode under his heart
so it wouldn’t last long
was about to walk away
when this chicken paddles out to him
and as he was falling hops on his neck
digs the beak into his throat
straightens legs and heaves
a red and blue vein out

Meanwhile he fell
and the chicken walked away

still tugging at the vein
till it was 12 yards long
as if it held that body like a kite
Gregory’s last words being

get away from me yer stupid chicken

I am kind of depressed now because I just realized that none of these things that I have shared with you I share with my co-workers after more than 5 years working together, in a very small office space.  Because I don’t think they are interested in hearing about it.

Without further ado, I am going to pass this award along to….   Drum roll please…

Tomatoes on the Vine

Velva’s food/cooking blog is more than that.  She genuinely believes in the simple ritual of sharing a meal as the way we create and maintain a community.  Besides, it is always yummy to look at the photos.


On her blog, Jessica comes up with ideas.  Lots and lots of ideas.  I honestly cannot tell you what her blog is about.  But I enjoy reading her ramblings.  They make me smile.  Her latest “scheme” is to get everybody to come up with a “I am thankful for” list and send it to her before November 24.  So why not?!

Life is Not a Movie

I think Robin is a bit insane.  I said that with affection and as a compliment.  She is a woman of many talents: a radio show, a photography blog, and who knows what else.  Warning: She is an avid Kevin Spacey fan.  So don’t say anything bad about Kevin. Or introduce yourself as Mrs. Spacey.  I never know what to expect when I click on her blog every day.  But it is always a nice surprise.

My Wildlife’s Words

Jennifer Lynn is a wildlife biologist. Seriously, I’d never thought I would meet someone in that line of business.  She is saving the earth for all of us!  And her observations of life are full of interesting perspectives that will make you go, How come I’ve never thought of it that way?  (Well, you would have if you were a wildlife biologist.  And if you are, do let me know!  I’d never thought I would meet TWO!)  She is probably going to protest and say, “I don’t write about THAT topic on a regular basis.  It was an one-off special edition. Limited time only.”  But her post on Elk Vagina, yup, you read that correctly, is educational and hilarious.

Where Insulin Meets Insolence

Lynn is a great writer.  She has a great way with words.  And metaphors.  (Well, duh, all great writers are good at these things.  This is why I am not a good writer).  This post is one of my all-time favorites: Four on the Floor.  I think she should publish some of her essays.  They are that good.  This is her personal blog where she can be, well, “insolent”.  Her essays are over at “I have measured out my lives in MP3s”.

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like britney spears. only better. « booshy
November 15, 2009 at 9:14 am


Jessica November 4, 2009 at 6:00 am

Yea! Thanks for the award! Since I’m already random….well, hmmm…
.-= Jessica´s last blog ..booshy blessings (aka extra work for you…) =-.

Robin November 4, 2009 at 7:47 am

A. After reading that list I like you so so much more, which probably says something about me.
B. I am insane, not clinically because nobody has been able to catch me to diagnose me.
C. Back off, Kevin is MINE!
.-= Robin´s last blog ..Wildebeests and Bibles =-.

Jennifer Lynn November 4, 2009 at 12:38 pm

Ok. I have to be really honest. I clapped like a little school girl and shouted a Lil’ John quote when I saw my name on your super list…..I will spare you anymore description. Thank you very much. Your bit about Jane……..I feel the same about you and her both. I am TOTALLY commenting as Mrs. Spacey next time on Robin’s;)

ps: This girl loves her some rice too, and I am so jealous of your Billy the Kid role!
.-= Jennifer Lynn´s last blog ..In Print!! =-. November 4, 2009 at 7:21 pm

To know you is to love you :)

Congrats on your award!
.-=´s last blog…Would It Be Wrong? =-.

A Vapid Blonde November 4, 2009 at 9:39 pm

I totally need to respond to this…but SHIT! I can’t right now.
You are awesome!
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog…My Broken Goul =-.

fernweher November 4, 2009 at 11:56 pm

When you say “this thing created by Al Gore,” are you talking about I love that site!
.-= fernweher´s last blog…United Nations Saves Cellphones =-.

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 9:14 am

@ Jessica
I hereby absolve you from the obligation of having to write the Random Things. I know you’ve got a lot going on over there. Now I have to be mean to the others though. They may cry foul…

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 9:15 am

@ Robin
A. *blushing* Yup. You and I are in the same insanity camp then.
B. See A
C. I am scared now whenever I LOOK at Kevin Spacey. “Omg. I can feel Robin breathing down on me…”

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 9:17 am

@ Jennifer Lynn
I am glad you are excited about the award. If you like rice, I will have no problem adopt you when you stop by Chicago. It is cheap. LOL.

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 9:18 am

Thank you! Stop it. You are making feel me all gooey inside. I am the sarcastic one. Now I am losing my edge… 😉

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 9:19 am

@ A Vapid Blonde
Thank you. You are awesome too. And where did you find that picture of that BUSH woman?! I am still seeing it in my mind’s eye. LOL.

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 9:21 am

@ fernweher
I meant the Internet… LOL. Depending on how you define “invent/create”, the tech people that were involved in the actual creation of the Internet, actually gave Gore a lot of credit.

I will check out

Jane November 5, 2009 at 10:16 am

Awwww! You said such sweet things about lil ol’ me. But now…the pressure. Oh, the pressure to live up to your expectations! And seriously? I’ve never said a single cuss word? Now my head hurts. But really, you are too kind and so deserving. I just love visiting you and hearing about what’s on YOUR mind. I find you fascinating! But then you go and burst my bubble about Al Gore. I so enjoyed teasing about his “claim” to invent the internet.

Thanks for the accolades and thanks for pointing us in the direction of some really great blogs! But most of all, thanks for being you!
.-= Jane´s last blog…Competition Is Good =-.

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 10:41 am

@ Jane
I can’t respond to your comment since I don’t want people to roll their eyes and say in their heads…

Velva November 5, 2009 at 6:19 pm

Oh my! You made my day!!! You actually ike my blog!!!! I love food what can I say, and I love yours and Jane’s blog. You have made my day.

By the way, you asked me about the bacon vodka blog post…..Had I seen it? Yes, I saw it, that is why I started following your blog. I wanted to know if you were really going to drink that concoction……Did you?
.-= Velva´s last blog…One Martini, Two Martini, Three Martini, The Floor =-.

A Vapid Blonde November 5, 2009 at 8:29 pm

@Absence Alternatives
Just found it on my nightly perusing of the internet…also the heartache of not being on stage any more is something I completely get. I have made people laugh and cry while completely sober on a stage baring my soul…very few people understand the fullfilment that comes with that. In fact I don’t understand it myself, though I have done it…worked for it even. I long for the moment when I will revisit my *acting days*, sadly I feel that is a long way off.
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog…My Broken Goul =-.

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 11:50 pm

@ Velva
The bacon vodka connection, eh? LOL. I tasted a bit. It is not bad at all. I need to get bloody mary material to make a bloody mary with my bacon vodka. Maybe I should come visit you with it. LOL. I may get arrested at the airport by the TSA… 😉

Absence Alternatives November 5, 2009 at 11:55 pm

@ A Vapid Blonde
Why a long way off? You totally should! I mean it. There must be a community theatre near you. That would be a start. And they are always looking to have new blood, no? (Ok, maybe the scary French farmer will come and ogle you on stage, but that would be so worth it to get to relive that feeling again!) And seriously, m’lady, you are like hot. Please do give it a try! We need to reduce the heartache in this world. One at a time.

Jessica November 8, 2009 at 5:54 pm

Really?!? REALLY?!?!

I think I love you. Good blog karma…coming your way. :)
.-= Jessica´s last blog…pomegranates: the spawn of the devil. or a strawberry and a cantaloupe had an affair. =-.

Absence Alternatives November 8, 2009 at 8:27 pm

@ Jessica
*blush* you know I didn’t do this to get something in return. I truly enjoy all these blogs (and the others I didn’t mention in this post). Hey, so you are not lost any more? I’m glad you found your way back… :-)

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