Glue Gun, Pom Poms and Googly Eyes: Props for Mother of the Year medal

September 21, 2009

in no manual for parenting

That is: if your kids, like mine, don’t know any better…

My kids are ok.  They don’t know any other way of living.

I say this often.  Sometimes, I am merely being sarcastic, and self-deprecating.  (Ha. Like that’s a surprise…)  Sometimes, I am being dead serious…

I didn’t realize we were poor until the other day when I was telling my co-worker how I slept in my parents’ bedroom until I was in senior high because there was not enough room in the apartment.

“Oh, shit! We were poor!”

It’s like a light bulb went up.  It finally dawned on me.  But did I notice it when I was growing up? Nah. I simply didn’t know any better.

Similarly, my kids don’t know any better.  I seldom “cook”, cook.  So when I make biscuits from the tube-thingy, bake a cake from the boxed mix, or make cookies from the scoop-a-tub, they think I am making stuff “from scratch”.  If I have to cut up vegetables and make something that requires more than 2 pots and/or more than 5 ingredients, boy, we are having a “family feast”.  I am not proud of deceiving my kids.  All I can say is, “My future daughters-in-law are going to thank me!”

I do believe that every mom needs a glue gun at home.  And if you want to reach for the stars, an endless supply of pom poms and googly eyes.   Because when you have a rainy afternoon to while away with your kids (and honestly, the constant “We are so bored” whining litany is really getting on your nerves), you break out that glue gun, and then you glue those suckers onto ANYTHING that’s lying around the house.  ANYTHING.

All of a sudden, your kids are so wowed by their own creations that there are stars in their eyes, and they think you are as awesome as that gal from Trading Spaces.  And for a moment, you’ll believe you are.


Glue Gun: $7

Bag of pom poms: $1

Bag of googly eyes (the fancy kind): $3

Being Mom of the Year for one afternoon: Priceless

{ 2 trackbacks }

Those who do the laundry should have immunity. Just sayin… | The Absence of Alternatives
October 3, 2009 at 9:37 am
Forget glue guns: Metallic Permanent Pens are the only things you need… | The Absence of Alternatives
November 11, 2009 at 8:21 pm


Jane September 21, 2009 at 2:05 pm

Man! I don’t have a glue gun and you just showed me all that my kids are missing. Luckily, they’re in the next room watching Ruff Ruffman. I’m going to sneak away quietly so they’ll never know!
.-= Jane´s last blog ..The Grass Isn’t Greener. It’s Just Different. =-.

Velva September 21, 2009 at 7:31 pm

This blog makes me smile every time I visit. I can totally relate to the glue gun theory. This was another great post.

P.S. I would love to put a printer ‘thing a ma ghig” on my blog. I looked it up on blog help and could not locate the right information. If you know how to place the icon that will allow printing, please let me know.

Mama Zen September 21, 2009 at 8:34 pm

I have GOT to get a glue gun. I need all the help that I can get!
.-= Mama Zen´s last blog ..Just For Y’all =-.

Absence Alternatives September 21, 2009 at 8:43 pm

My ladies, you guys totally make my day. I think I should just marry you all. Utah, anybody? 😉 Glue guns are the best if you have 2 left hands and are all thumbs like me. Glue guns are the safest in my case. I seriously glued my fingers shut with crazy glue once, so yeah… And seriously (I say that a lot, don’t I?…) my kids do treat me like I am the best mom in the world whenever we do quick-and-easy-but-they-don’t-know-it arts and crafts with my cheapo glue gun. I actually feel sorry for them…

Absence Alternatives September 21, 2009 at 9:11 pm

@ Velva
Dear Lady Velva, I googled & found some “code” that people hacked for Blogger for printer-friendly pages. THEN I realized: “AddThis” actually provides the function for printer-friendly format. I already added it to my blog so at the end of each post, there is a “share/save button”: amongst the 1000 ways for people to share with their loved ones my wonderful posts (LOL), “PrintFriendly” is one of them. Since “AddThis” also supports Blogger, you may want to take a look. Actually, y’all with much better blogs need to go get one of those Share buttons, not me. :-) GO NOW!

sean bopper November 12, 2009 at 11:04 pm

I was going to get that Dow Tough Stuff foam and kinda make little foam faetuses and put googly eyes on them and just kind of drive around the city dropping them out of car window. Or, put 10,000 on a church lawn?

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